Abiding In Jesus
‘‘Whoever confesses that Jesus is the Son of God, God abides in him, and he in God” 1 John 4:15.
As I read and re-read 1 John, the word abide continues to arrest me, sprinkled 18 times throughout chapter 2, 3, and 4. As I leaned in and listened, the Lord profoundly impacted my Christmas planning and preparations (See Blog: Expectation vs. Anticipation, A Mother’s Lament at Christmas). So much of what Jesus is impressing on me with the word abide is the power of being with him and others, rather than being consumed with doing or saying the right thing. From this place of being with Jesus (abiding), his love flows through me in tangible ways.
So, what does it mean, what does it look like, to abide?
The Greek word for abide is meno. It’s a verb meaning to remain and is used in reference to a place, to a time, or to a state or condition. It also can mean to wait for, await one. 1 John 4:15 seems to be speaking of a state or condition believers have, both God abiding in us AND us abiding in God, present tense, as a result of confessing Jesus is the son of God. Abiding is the result of believing, of being saved. It is a state or condition. Thayer’s Greek Lexicon notes, “something has established itself permanently within my soul, and always exerts its power in me.” John confirms this reminding his audience of our anointing of the Holy Spirit (1 John 2:20, 27, 3:24, 4:13) and the reality we are children of God (3:1, 2, 10, 5:2), God’s seed abiding in us (1 Johns 3:9).
There is evidence of our condition of abiding (being saved). We walk the same way Jesus walked (1 John 2:6), love believers (1 John 2:10), do the will of God (1 John 2:17), keep his commandments (1 John 3:24). “And this is his commandment, that we believe in the name of his Son Jesus Christ and love one another, just as he has commanded us” I John 3:23.
I think most of us can honestly say, we experience times of walking with Jesus this way, loving others as he has, doing his will and keeping his commandments. Our hearts desire is to do these things consistently; to be faithful. Yet, in our humanness, this evidence is inconsistent at best; sometimes it’s actually quite fleeting. I mess up and fall painfully short in loving those closest to me. In these moments my internal critic, fueled by the enemy of my soul, pours on guilt and shame.
I begin functioning in a state of fear, fear of being punished. My self-critic has overtaken me. It’s impossible for me to truly love (agape) others when I am not connected to the perfect love, acceptance, safety, and security of Jesus. My position hasn’t changed but the state in my body has changed. I have moved from the state of safety in my body to the state of fear and danger. It’s as if the clouds have come and blocked the sun. I can’t see it anymore, nor can I feel the warmth, nor experience the light it brings.
My position of security doesn’t ever change (John 10:28-29). However, my awareness of my security and my position as a child of God seems to get clouded. Let’s be real, I can stay stuck in this place for days. For some, I suspect that’s all you’ve ever known. We constantly judge ourselves, criticizing, never measuring up, even when Jesus sees it so differently.
In these moments, I am seeing myself through the eyes of those who raised me. We all do. This is attachment. I learn who I am in relationship and in the world through the eyes of those that mirror myself to me.
For some, the eyes of parents have been characterized as loving, balanced by a nurturing presence that ensures being seen, soothed, safe, and secure. Not perfection, but a consistency with the assurances of repairs when they failed in their humanness. Some of these parents have Jesus abiding in them. What was reflected by these parents may have included Jesus, if they were believers with Jesus abiding in them.
For others, this includes me, the eyes of my parents created a distorted mirror for me to discover myself. Their eyes were clouded with the pain of their own trauma. The image they projected instilled negative beliefs that for many years drove my internal and external experiences. This is the transmission of generational trauma.
BUT Jesus! I just love when the word “but” is used in the Bible. I have a new mirror, a place of abiding. A place of being known. A place of belonging. A place of security, confidence, and safety in a perfect love! Perfect love, that casts out fear!! Let that sink in. You are loved with a perfect love by the one who created you and knows you better than you know yourself.
Which mirror will I choose? Which mirror will you choose?